A Total Waste Of Four Dollars

Earlier this week I read an article online that said McDonald’s was introducing some premium burgers, or some other nonsense like that. I guess their idea is to compete with places like Five Guys and other burger joints that sell awesome hamburgers.

Sure enough, when we pulled up into the McDonald’s drive-thru tonight they had their three new burgers on the menu. There was a mushroom-swiss cheeseburger, a bacon cheeseburger, and a deluxe cheeseburger. When given the choice between Five Guys and McDonalds, I was pretty sure which one had the superior burger, but being the objective kind of guy I am, I thought we should test the new McDonald’s creations (you know, just to be fair).

Because we were “testing” the waters so to speak, Gidget and I decided to share the Bacon Cheeseburger. I had picked something else up for myself anyway, and Gidget wasn’t very hungry.

First of all, the box was enormous. The burgers are 100% angus beef and they weigh approximately one-third of a pound. We opened the box and we were disappointed just looking at it. There was bacon sticking out all over the place, a pickle barely holding on for dear life, and a strange aroma that reminded one of “liquid smoke”.

Gidget ripped the burger in half and handed some to me. The appearance alone made it unappetizing. It looked like one-third pound of hamburger shoved between two buns. Just to be fair, the bacon cheeseburger consisted of the bun, the beef patty, cheese, bacon, onions, and pickles. And just to be honest, the best tasting part of the burger was the onions and pickles.

The beef tasted weird. It wasn’t bad, as in causing you to get sick bad, but it tasted bad, as in I will never eat that again because it tasted like crap. The bacon was the strangest part. It was nasty and it left a chemical after-taste on your tongue. It was very similar to something made with an excess of liquid smoke.

Needless to say, buying the new Bacon Cheeseburger from McDonald’s was a complete waste of $4.00 and I can guarantee you that I don’t need to try the mushroom-swiss cheeseburger or the deluxe cheeseburger to know they probably suck as well.

Thanks but no thanks McDonald’s, I’ll stick with Five Guys.