Scoundrels & Liars

bigfatliar.jpgI hate liars. I mean, I really, really, hate liars. I know I am not supposed to hate, but when it comes to liars I cannot help myself. As you know I have been “let go” from my day job. As of this morning, they still owed me for one paycheck and six months of phone bills. Let’s review.

I first saw signs of trouble back in October of last year when I was informed I would not be re-imbursed for three months of phone bills until the company got “more money coming in”. Paying my phone bill was one of the benefits I had received for ten years so I should have suspected something then, I suppose. Fast forward to January of this year.

On Monday the 12th, I received a call from the now former boss (who we will call “Big Fat Liar”) telling me that I was no longer an employee but they wanted me to complete the current project I was working on under contract. The Big Fat Liar told me he could no longer afford to pay my salary, so he had no choice other than putting me under contract.

On Tuesday the 13th, after he learned that the incompetent fools he hired to replace me (yes I said fools, plural) couldn’t do the job, he called again to tell me that he needed me to finish the project immediately, but that I still wasn’t going to remain an employee. That’s right, he basically said, “You’re still fired, but I want you to work the remainder of the week”. Fat chance you Big Fat Liar.

In that same conversation he told me that my paycheck would not be direct deposited, and they were sending me a paper check. I figured, since they were letting me go, that was normal. No problem.

On Saturday the 17th I still hadn’t received my check. As you know there is no mail on Sunday, and Monday was a federal holiday. When Tuesday (the 20th) rolled around, I still didn’t get my check. That’s when I realized there might be a problem. A big problem.


I ventured down to the unemployment office on Wednesday. I figured I better file for benefits, just in case. I heard a lot of horror stories about the crowd down there, but it wasn’t that bad at all. The wait wasn’t too bad and I met a couple of really nice people before they called me back for my appointment.

I was a little worried about my ability to collect unemployment because I had nothing on paper from the Big Fat Liar indicating his suggestion that I keep working under contract. The gentleman who entered my claim said he didn’t think it was going to be a problem, but who knows what the Big Fat Liar might say. An hour and a half later I walked out with my Claimant Handbook, and when I got home I was more angry than I was before. There was still no paycheck in the mailbox.

My mind was racing about all of the possibilities at this point. Was I going to receive that check? What will happen to me and my family if I don’t receive it? Then something else hit me. It hit me hard. What if the Big Fat Liar was just that, a Big Fat Liar? The only proof I have of his contract offer are the phone conversations we had on the 12th and 13th. What if he denied ever saying that? That could really screw up my attempt to collect unemployment. If I was the worrying type I might have hyperventilated.

By the time Thursday rolled around, I started to get numb. I still didn’t have a check. Seven days after I was supposed to get it, I was sitting here wondering if it would come in the mail. Then I got the e-mail. We’ll call it the Magical E-mail.

The Magical E-mail was from the company “controller”, also known as the “Psycho Bitch From Hell”. She has tried everything in her power since 2001 to get me fired, or to make me quit. It took her nine years but it appears she finally succeeded. Of course, her victory is bittersweet, because the Magical E-mail contains all of the proof and verification I need to prove (a) I was not terminated for poor job performance, (b) they owe me six months of phone bills, (c) they were sending my paycheck that day (the 22nd) and (d) that she and the Big Fat Liar were never honorable people in the first place.

It’s not that I think I am irreplaceable, but come on. After ten years working for the company, it’s not like someone else can walk through that door and just do my job. It appears they are learning that lesson now, and I could not be happier.

I received my paycheck this afternoon. It was a manual check. Printed at the office, on the Psycho Bitch from Hell’s printer, with no payroll deduction information. It was dated January 22nd. That’s right. They never cut my paycheck on the 15th.

Honestly, I don’t think they intended to ever send me that check. Why didn’t I receive a normal paycheck with the proper payroll deduction information? Did they not make the payroll deductions to avoid showing me on the payroll for this year at all?

So why did the Psycho Bitch From Hell wait to cut my check? Was it some sort of game she wanted to play? What? Are we in the third grade now? Why did the Big Fat Liar feel the need to lie to me?

They say, “What comes around, goes around”, and I honestly believe it will. I’m still waiting to hear the details of this “contract” and even when they send it, they’ll be waiting for hell to freeze over before I offer my services to them for any price.